"Award shows: a fundamental right of passage in the entertainment industry, whereby celebrities, who do not get enough recognition and worship as is, are gifted with golden statues for literally just doing their jobs well. Now, I understand that other professions give out awards and have ceremonies to celebrate the accomplishments of people in their field, but let’s get one thing straight: they don’t matter. The National Teacher of the Year Award, the AMA Excellence in Medicine Award, or National Society of Accountant’s Accountant of the Year Award—they’re all meaningless awards, for meaningless careers. The only ones who matter are entertainers and blog writers, amen."
"One thing you should know about me is that, despite my whimsical, playful, and otherwise merry exterior, I am often filled with existential dread. I grapple with many of the timeless questions that have similarly stressed history’s great thinkers: why are we here? What is our purpose? Is there such thing as natural law? A universal conception of “good”? Is there a God? If so, then why are there nations ravaged by famine? And war? Who killed Kennedy? Am I an Evelyn? A Jenny? Maybe an Adam or a Phillip?"
"Hi, there :) how are you? :) did you miss me? :) oh :(
That’s unfortunate. I was very excited about sharing my New Year’s resolutions with you in my first blog post of 2018…Wait. You know what? To quote a quote from the greatest show in Cabaret Theatre history, Ordinary Days, directed by David Novis, 'Well, screw you!'"